Mine is the ongoing story of a lifelong learner.
In this, we are likely more similar than different.
I was born and raised on the east side of Cincinnati.
For any desire I might have to share my time with people
of the world abroad, I will always possess fondness
for those more familiar. Amongst them prominently are
my family - including those who share with me a
fellowship which rivals any relation by blood. When the
time comes that we should part ways, I would hope
for nothing more than that we would leave each other
as greater people than when first we met.
My upbringing was borne from parents who recognized -
at the very least, but certainly not as a limit - that the
common responsibility they bore in the fluorishing of their
children superceded their differences with one another.
In spite of adverse circumstances which deprived them of
the knowledge, experience, skills and tools which may
have provided further opportunities for both themselves
and their family, they laid for me a groundwork of
personal responsibility, from which I have engaged in
my own development of a more refined sense of
Reason: an ideal to which there is no greater authority.
I was, in my childhood, similarly unwitting to the
unfortunate circumstances surrounding me, as so many
are in youth (and as even some are into adulthood).
Reflecting on this, I can recall specific moments which
I am now able to identify as the suppression of my
conscious abilities, with varying degrees and magnitudes
of intentionality on the part of the parties involved.
Likewise, however, I am also able to recall moments in
which these innate qualities were brought to bear.
In the case of those who, through the refinment of their
own consciousness, found personal responsibility in
assisting me to the refinement of my own, I have only
sincere gratitude; and, even for those who did not -
even those who presented to me with excrutiating clarity
situations inherently unreasonable such that I might,
inadvertently to their intentions (or lack thereof for that
matter), come to terms with contradiction and over-
come it - I also have naught but appreciation. It would be
my hope that, were they to recognize the purpose-
fulness of their actions in my life, they might also derive
some perspective of inherent meaning from them.
Written between September and October of 2023.
Today, I am two months past twenty-three years old.
Last spring, I concluded my schooling, graduating with
a degree in GRAPHIC DESIGN from the UNIVERSITY
OF CINCINNATI. I am working to develop in myself an
entreprenuerial skillset so that I can offer these services
to others on terms which are honest, straightforward and
relatively negotiable. This process is only one facet of
my grander plot: in which I learn to consistently apply my
aforementioned personal responsibility so that I might
enjoy the personal freedom which accompanies it.
During my time studying at the university, I became
increasingly disillusioned with the entire prospect
of schooling and so-called "higher education". I enrolled
in the College of Design, Architecture, Art and Planning
on account of its prestigious reputation - a reputation that
resides almost entirely in the institution's past - which
it inevitably failed to live up to. While I found favor in the
sort of work I did during this time, I simply couldn't
come to terms with the reasons I was given for doing it.
To willingly accept the rationale as it was handed down
to me without any sort of scrutiny, as my classmates often
did, was a demoralizing prospect. This realization I had,
of the frivolous nature of higher education to the ends of
developing a sense of independence, led me to the
further realization that, were I to continue pursuing this
path in my life, I would become far less useful to
myself and those important fixtures of my life than
I would be to the myriad of unseen societal
actors whose values are quite foreign to my own.
Prior to my enrollment, I - like so many others before me -
believed that collegiate life was the inevitable next step in
my development into adulthood. I believed this nearly
blindly, on account of the lack of conscious consideration
I had actually applied to the whole affair. Reminiscing on
my life so far, it's almost alarming how little thought I have
given as to what I feel would be an appropriate use of
the limited time I have been so graciously given.
There are motivators to my thinking along these lines
besides my attempted pursuit of education - these being
the more tangible recognition of my own potential
mortality through witnessing that of my parents, and the
novel yet blatant form of collective trauma which has
afflicted the sleeping public over the past three years.
There exists a status quo of naive stagnancy,
a subconscious assumption amongst the majority
of society as I have seen it, that all practical
circumstances - in spite of past evidence - will
remain unchanged for the future indefinite.
I am, at times, a victim of this mentality as much
as anyone. As we entered the third decade
of the 21st century, circumstances predicated on
the actions of the few yet unforseen by the
many upended my ability to consistently hold
this sort of assumption as so many do.